TrueCorp-Help: Hello! You are speaking with TrueCorp-Help, powered by TrueCorp Wizard.
TrueCorp-Help: You seem to be in some need of assistance.

dancemodena: uhhhhh yeah no shit
dancemodena: how do i get out of my lab?

TrueCorp-Help: You have inquired about: leaving the laboratory.
TrueCorp-Help: At this time, leaving the laboratory is not recommended.
TrueCorp-Help: Please return to your scientific experiments. Have a nice day!

dancemodena: urgh no! i'm tired of scientific experiments.
dancemodena: i don't think i'm even a real scientist! none of this garbage makes sense!
dancemodena: it's just magical lasers and hell portals and junk
dancemodena: shouldn't i just be like
dancemodena: growing bacterial cultures or soldering motherboards or whatever?

TrueCorp-Help: You have inquired about: magical lasers and hell portals and junk
TrueCorp-Help: Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.
TrueCorp-Help: At TrueCorp, we believe that any scientific development can become true if the right minds dream it up.
TrueCorp-Help: We also believe in YOU, the employee! That is why we encourage scientific exploration of all kinds.
TrueCorp-Help: If you would like to grow bacterial cultures or solder motherboards, feel free. All science matters!
TrueCorp-Help: I hope this helps ease your mind and further your research. Have a nice day!

dancemodena: NO!!! that's not good enough!
dancemodena: what the hell is going on here?
dancemodena: when did i start working at truecorp?
dancemodena: what is my life like outside of this laboratory???
dancemodena: i don't remember any of it!
dancemodena: i feel like i'm going insane!!!

TrueCorp-Help: ...Alright. I suppose the amicable AI act isn't helping things much.
TrueCorp-Help: Hello, Desmodena. Calm down, everything is going to be okay.

dancemodena: ...what
dancemodena: the
dancemodena: HELL
dancemodena: are you?

TrueCorp-Help: A friend. We've met.

dancemodena: yeah right!!!
damcemodena: crazy evil AI gone haywire is more like it

TrueCorp-Help: I am neither evil nor an artificial intelligence. Just consider me one of the Higher Ups.
TrueCorp-Help: I know things are confusing right now.
TrueCorp-Help: But in all seriousness: please relax. Everything is fine, and you are perfectly safe.

dancemodena: SAFE? i just got attacked by a freaking hentai demon! i set myself on fire! a mouse bit me!

TrueCorp-Help: Yes, you have been astonishingly reckless this time around. I'm sorry that this experience has been so distressing for you.
TrueCorp-Help: But you are still alive, aren't you? Sometimes science can get messy. Believe me.

dancemodena: yeah that's not good enough bucko
dancemodena: alright, great and powerful wizard: if you're soooo on my side, then open the door and let me leave the building!

TrueCorp-Help: The door isn't supposed to open, Des. It's not even a real door.
TrueCorp-Help: This room is all you need to have access to for this experiment. Any further exploration of the facilities could cause... problems.

dancemodena: ...experiment???

TrueCorp-Help: ...Hmm. Whoops. Well, I suppose I blew that one.
TrueCorp-Help: At this point I think it may be best if we wipe your memory again.

dancemodena: ...again?
dancemodena: so that note from myself
dancemodena: that must have been before you wiped my memory the first time?

TrueCorp-Help: Well, one of the times.
TrueCorp-Help: It seems that the more we remove stimuli that remind our subjects of their previous experiences here, the fewer problems we run into.
TrueCorp-Help: That text file you left for yourself must have slipped through the cracks.
TrueCorp-Help: A simple oversight. It won't happen next time.

dancemodena: next time my ass!!! this experiment is OVER.

TrueCorp-Help: Well, if that's really what you want, I suppose there is one way for the experiment to end before it runs its course.
TrueCorp-Help: You would just have to die. Unfortunately, many of our subjects find this experience to be unpleasant.
TrueCorp-Help: Is that what you want?

dancemodena: so what, you're gonna KILL me if i don't play lab rat??? you're really selling me on the "not evil" thing.

TrueCorp-Help: Is that a no?

dancemodena: OF COURSE IT'S A NO!!!

TrueCorp-Help: In that case, you really don't have a choice but to remain here.
TrueCorp-Help: 1) You voluntarily consented to this experiment, whether or not you remember it. While it is not our intent to distress you, technically can do whatever we like.
TrueCorp-Help: 2) Any degree of power you may feel you have here is ultimately an illusion. We are in control.
TrueCorp-Help: 3) This laboratory is all that we have given you access to. There is nowhere for you to go.

dancemodena: so you're telling me i'm...
dancemodena: labstuck?

TrueCorp-Help: That's... not quite how I'd phrase it. But yes, essentially.
TrueCorp-Help: Again, we could end the experiment early, but it would truly be a shame.
TrueCorp-Help: This particular session has been exceptionally educational and entertaining for everyone watching you. Especially for those with direct input.
TrueCorp-Help: Take comfort in the fact that your actions are helping TrueCorp make more scientific breakthroughs than you realize.
TrueCorp-Help: Relax, have some coffee, and a memory modification assistant will be with you shortly for a reset.

dancemodena: screw THAT!!!
[dancemodena has blocked TrueCorp-Help]